


Unguarded and hopeful

by orphan_account



Series: Prompts, drabbles and whatever [8]
Category: Roswell New Mexico (TV 2019)
Genre: Cuddling & Snuggling, Hugs, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Nightmares
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-24
Updated: 2020-09-24
Packaged: 2021-03-07 23:35:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 711
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26635963
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Michael kisses Alex's cotton clad shoulder, arms coming up to hold him around his middle, one hand resting on Alex's chest, right where is heart is beating.
Relationships: Michael Guerin/Alex Manes
Series: Prompts, drabbles and whatever [8]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1814869
Comments: 2
Kudos: 65





	Unguarded and hopeful

Sometimes he wakes in the middle of the night, thoughts and emotions loud and messy, his breath short, heartbeat irregular, hands trembling. Michael doesn’t like nights like these, where he goes to bed exhausted but takes a million and one year to fall asleep. Nights in which he dreams of beautiful smiles and haunted eyes, of fire and ash, or blood, _so much blood_.

Today Michael wakes up expecting for there to be a body to hold, he wakes up expecting Alex to be next to him. When he reaches across the bed to find a cold pillow, his chest aches with the force of a thousand tornados. There are days he thinks that maybe he will be okay, there are other days where the grief swallows him whole, encompasses every cell and centimeter of his weak mind.

He gasps for air sporadically, his heart racing in his chest. He chokes out a sob, wishing the smell of blood and the stickiness was not on him, _because he was stabbed with a broken syringe and his neck was bleeding_. He curls on himself, pushing Alex's cold pillow to his chest. _Because everyone he ever loves always leaves_. Maybe he would fall asleep again and dream of warm hugs and gentle touches. Soft kisses and tender words ushered to him, followed by bright smiles. 

Michael squeezes his eyes shut, tears hot against his face. He’s shaking and huddled into himself. He opens his eyes and lets out another sob, only to jump at the sound of their bedroom door opening, and what Michael was aching so much for is finally here. The careful words whispered to him, the soft, light touches that never failed to comfort him. _Alex is here_.

"Alex?" he asks, unsure. "Alex." He breathes out again, unguarded and hopeful.

"I'm here." Alex is fast to assure him, interlacing their fingers, resting their foreheads together, pressing a chest kiss to his cheek. He latches to Alex's voice like he's drowning, in need of an anchor to pull him back to land. 

A small sigh escapes his lips, as though he’d hardly dared to believe it until he heard it confirmed, followed by a small whine. He wants Alex so much, but he doesn't want him to see Michael like this, crying, shivering, _losing his mind_. "I'm sorry," He mumbles through tears, wishing he could close his eyes and be spared the embarrassment. 

Alex whispers something and suddenly Michael is carefully tucked into his neck, held close like he was a child, and for once, Michael hurt too much to care. Here, practically on top of Alex, hugging him tightly, and breathing him in, is everything Michael ever wanted. Alex's fingers trace along the edge of his face, cupping between his hands, forcing Michael to look him in the eye. 

"You're here?" Michael asks once more, his left hand grabs tightly to Alex's shirt. "Can I hold you?"

"I'm here and I'm not going anywhere," Alex says, sweet, soft and careful. "You don’t have to tell me, but you don't have to pretend, either."

Alex doesn't sound angry, instead, he looks tired, Michael realizes, taking in the strained lines fanning around the corners of his mouth, the pallor of his cheeks. Alex falls forward. He throws himself into his embrace and in return Michael clings back desperately, pressing kisses to his hair, snuggling his nose against Alex's soft strands. This time Michael doesn't cry, he also doesn’t open his eyes when he breathes quietly, "Thank you."

There is a moment of silence. Michael kisses Alex's cotton clad shoulder, arms coming up to hold him around his middle, one hand resting on Alex's chest, right where is heart is beating. He peppers Alex with kisses, honest and gentle. They need this, the promise of safety and eternal love. They had needed it then, but they would have never accepted it.

"For being here," is the soft-spoken reply that Michael utters. This feels right. Drawing Alex's closer, shamelessly clinging to his back, resting his head on the crown of his head, Alex's hair tickling his chin. Michael's voice is soft and airy, as if he is afraid to destroy this moment if he spoke too loudly. "Just, please, don't let go."

"I won't." 


End file.
